What Resonates

When I was 15, and I got my official diagnosis, I went on a quest to learn about and understand my illness and to fight that isolation where it seemed no one shared all these feelings I was having, all the suffering. This was 1996, so I went to my local public library and checked … Continue reading What Resonates →

Not Today

What do we say to the God of Death? Not Today. I am at a strange moment in my life. I tried to build a new life for myself diligently, escaping what felt like a toxic narrative loop, and even embraced the uncertainty of how it would turn out. Then it came crumbling down in … Continue reading Not Today →

Have you tried to meditate? Oh, Fuck off.

Have you tried to meditate? Because I found it really helped me…… Oh fuck off already. Have you used St. John’s Wart? Have you checked your thyroid? Have you been exercising regularly? Do you practice yoga? Have you done Cognitive Behavior Therapy? You just need to learn to combat your negative thinking. A multivitamin? Do … Continue reading Have you tried to meditate? Oh, Fuck off. →

Dissecting a Diagnosis.

I traditionally put a lot of stock in a diagnosis. It made, what was otherwise dismissed or denied in my adolescent years as teenage angst, feel real, acknowledged, validated. That need for a diagnosis persisted over the years, it felt like the only way I could get the world to see I wasn’t lazy, too … Continue reading Dissecting a Diagnosis. →

Vocabulary of Depression

We lack the vocabulary to discuss depression. People have desperately tried to distinguish ordinary sadness from depression. We rely on slew of insufficient metaphors as described in this link. We tell the world, we can’t get out of bed, we describe it as excruciating emotional pain or joy-less malaise, we emphasize it’s physical manifestations reciting … Continue reading Vocabulary of Depression →